Stranger Danger

We've all heard about the tummy rubbing phenomenon for those pregnant mommies-to-be who are already showing, and there are many tried and true methods for combating the overly touchy populace. My personal favorite is the reciprocal belly pat; they rub your belly, and when they stop you pat whatever paunch they have, and say "it's so cute!".

However, there are people who go somewhat above and beyond the norm of inappropriateness. Whether this be by ignorance, a generation gap, over-excitement, or even a facination with the process of pregnancy, it is almost always unsettling. My experience today fell under this very unsettling category. This is by far the strangest and most disturbing encounter that I've had my entire pregnancy, and probably makes the top five for my entire life.

I was grocery shopping with Dane and our friend Ryan at the local Food Lion, and there was some confusion at the front of the store as we were coming in. An ill-placed ketchup display was blocking traffic in and out of the store, and for a moment I was stuck against a register block while Dane tried to navigate our cart into the store.

I feel a tap on my shoulder, looking over I see a man who's on the far side of seventy staring at my stomach. He leans over and whispers something I can't quite make out in my ear, standing uncomfortably close. I have a mild problem with strangers touching me, so I start to inch away, mumbling "uh-huh, have a nice day, sir" as I make my way toward Dane and the cart.

Suddenly, he grabs me by the upper arm-hard- gestures toward his wife on the far side of the register and says louder "We're looking for one, what are you having?" pointing at my belly with his free hand, still gripping my arm. Confused, disturbed, and desperate for an escape, I tell him I'm having a girl and jerk my arm out of his grip, fleeing gracelessly in the form of a quick walk to the fresh fruit section.

Dane and Ryan caught up with me a moment later while I tried to casually hide behind the Mango display, Dane telling me I shouldn't over react to an overly friendly senior citizens. Of course, he'd been too far away to hear what was said, or see the old man grab my arm. When I explained the situation he suddenly understood my hasty retreat.

I still can't figure out if the old man was just a little bit off, not realizing that he was making me uncomfortable, if he was trying to make a joke, or if he was seriously looking for a baby (you never know, people are weird). I don't know how I avoided yelling for Dane, I wasn't exaggerating my problem with being touched by strangers, most especially when it is uninvited.

I rarely get this very specific 'stranger danger' vibe from people. While I dislike being touched by people I don't know, it's a widely known fact that I'll give anyone the time of day, or an hour long conversation, whichever works for them! But very occasionally I meet someone who just pushes all the wrong buttons. The tingly feeling at the back of my skull starts, and suddenly there is a rock in the pit of my stomach. The very clear message that I get from my nervous system is "BAD NEWS!!!" That's the feeling I got from this old man. I've never stuck around somebody who gave me this feeling long enough to find out if it's crazy or not, but something about this guy rubbed me the wrong way.

My advice for any woman in this situation is to trust your intuition. If someone makes you nervous, just avoid them, or exit the vicinity as quickly as you can, if for no other reason than to avoid causing yourself stress.